Forum - View topicAnime story
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wildcyco
Posts: 15 |
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Why dont we post our own anime/ manga stories
i think it will be fun. just post up the plot characters or any other cool info... and if you are an artist post up pics if you can.... i'll post up my story soon but i'm feeling lazy right now 
I hope i put this in the right place i'm a fourms newb  ...
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Alex K.
Posts: 247 |
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So you're too lazy to post some story you probably haven't even written yet, but you had time to make this thread? Right. I won't hold my breath on ever seeing your story. If you want us to post our stories, you have to post your's first. Don't give us this "I'm too lazy," nonsense.
It shows. Oh, and there's already a thread like this: animenewsnetwork.com/bbs/phpBB2/viewtopic.php?t=21492&start=0. |
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wildcyco
Posts: 15 |
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OK I am redy to post up my story ...
sorry its a very generic story forgive my spelling and grammer mitakes It starts out with a kid named Gene and his brother Spike (the worlds best swordsmen) teaching gene who to defend for him self but gene would rather be a marksman than a swardsman. Then a group of skeer (big 4 armed alians) Spike tells gene to leve town wile spike tries to find Alex(sister) and gabe(baby brother). just as gene is exiting the village, a skeer aims his rifle and before it shoots spike kills it but gene gets shot in his ankle and rips over a small cliff. when he wakes up he finds him self with a mysterious girl named Naomi. she specializes in health care she can be a fully critified doctor if she wanted to be but she panicis too mutch. they dieside to explore the world becuase they do not have anything else to do. the stumble upon gene's town and it is engulfed in flames (very sad  ) They find another town and hang out for a bit and deside to go to the town of frostland for thw winter festivle. they go by train and get 3\4 what there
but the train was atacked. late gene finds him self to br fine but naomi is on the ground half dead and has hypetermia. gen found some salvaged suplies from the wreck and helps naomi stay warm. when gene relizes that her pulse is fading he gives her his jacket thou naomi woke up and forced him to put on a jackt and then she was saying thankyou for saving me and hugs gene... they then recoperate and head to frostland. they make it and party! the next day they go out (not really a date but a bit more date-ish than hanging out) they later run into miles the leader of the Iorn Gaurd spesial forces (and a famous mage) after beating up a bandit useing an ice shard. Gene desideds to join the Iorn gaurds (not special forces) . And Namoi tag along and follows gene. gene's first mission is to clear out a pirate drug refineing facility he compleats it without a sweat but gets atacked by skeer! he takes them out.barely. and naomi is impresed by gene's strength, even thoug he used a gun. later a new recrute named atrix enlisted as a demolitions expert and gene remembers him from his town and they rjoice. then big news came up there a huge armata of skeer coming and the Earth has to be evacuated. Namoi gets to go to luxsury class on the ship becuase iorn gaurds get to bring a geust. Gene is stuck gaurdig the cargo bay (boring) by him self. right before his shift ends there was a pirate attack! the scean turns into a masive battle! gene gets hit a few times but surves it. later he passes out from blood loss (from an unknown shot in the foot) he is found by miles and company and taken to naomi but she comes out in a towle (she was takeing a shower) and sees gene then she flips out and her towle falls off and she flips out even more! After calming down she fixes gene up and waits for him to wake then she looks out the window and stares into space and starts talking to her self. gene finaly woke up just as naomi was saying "is'nt space just butiful...Gene...gene I..I....I" and she starts crying ang gene comferts her. just then a soldire comes in and trys to warns gene but ges shot. the pirates are back! they fight and the leader says "give us the girl" then gene keeps on fighting , and just before the pirate dies she shoots naomi! Naomi is rushed to the med room though the monitor shows that she is dead! but miles orders the doctor to keep her on life supourt for 10 more minutes. after 7 minuts she wakes up and with no bullet wounds !? then she lifts her hand and reaches for gen and simply smiles. 10 days later the land on the planet of Delphie7. Gene gets payied a butt load off monny but naomi spends most of in on an enhanted corttosis fiber dress( you will see it when i post up my pics) and gene is like "awwww..." and then gene is called for a promotion and is admitted into the special foces and he meets and makes new freinds like barron, jett,Ireen, and Rei (who has a crush on gene and naomi finds her like a rivle constently battling for gene). END OF PART 1 what do you think tell me the good and the bad |
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Alex K.
Posts: 247 |
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The only things I have to say about this:
1.) You should come up with some different names, not "Gene" and "Spike," unless you want people to think this is some Outlaw Star/Cowboy Bebop spinoff. 2.) You really need to work on your spelling and grammar. No one's going to want to read a story about a "swardsman" who "rips over a small cliff" and then makes friends with a "critified" doctor who "panicis" too "mutch." Other than that, your story sounds pretty good. Just make sure you get an English teacher or a friend with good grammar to read it over or something if you actually want it to be readable. |
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Nagisa
Moderator
 Posts: 6128 Location: Atlanta-ish, Jawjuh |
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We already have another thread for this sort of thing. And as you've been told, your grammar and spelling are vastly unacceptable and need immediate improvement.
Locked. |
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