Forum - View topicHow can i get out of the fandom?
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jay saenz
 Posts: 81 Location: Costa Rica |
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I ve spend the last 8 years of my life in the anime fandom... i go to an anime club, I've been in 2 magazines, I've organized some events and colaborated in others, I've registered in several forums, i check ANN religiously everyday... watch at least 2 series per month... I buy magazines, have my room fill with posters, listen to j-music... etc
You can tell that i m an otaku... but for about a year, i ve started to fell a little bit tired of the fandom... i m having a hard time adapting myself to the new trends and people... I don't play TCG's, i don't cosplay and honestly... i hate yaoi and i dislike visual key groups. These are currenly the most popular trends among the local fandom. Right now the fandom in my country has grown up a lot... there are a lot of people that claim to be "otakus" and that's is good...but somehow i miss "the old good days" (i hate this, it makes me feel old) when we were a bunch of guys that sit down in the street to talk about anime. Right now with the events, the competition among the groups, the anime is a source of stress, and its not as funny as it used to be. I want to get out, but my friends don't want to let me leave... they keep on tell me that they need my help with the events, that i know a lot (which is not entirely truth in my opinion). I want to enjoy anime as a regular fan... just have fun. I m tired of work for the fandom, because i feel that i lost the enthusiasm... but at the same time i feel guilty about it... since i don't want to be a lazy guy, and i feel that i can waste a nice oportunity if i just leave everything like this. I m trying to get out... or at least i m trying to get back to the days when the anime was just a nice hobbie and not a second job. I wonder what would you think about this? |
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TranceLimit174
 Posts: 960 |
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Do whatcha gotta do. Depends on how you look at your situation. If you view it as a 'second job' that's too taxing then turn in your resignation so to speak. However if you view it as a commitment then finish what you started and then 'get out.' Ya just gotta do what will make you happy. If your friends don't want you to leave because of your knowledge then just pass the torch along. You can still be involved but not nearly as much as you have been if you want to reach a middle ground. It's all about what you think is best.
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dormcat
Encyclopedia Editor
 Posts: 9902 Location: New Taipei City, Taiwan, ROC |
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To Jay: There's no way out.
 You didn't set a goal to become an otaku; you are one when you realize it. The phenomenon currently happening to you is that you've been "jaded" and become a bit tired, particularly towards recent "popular" series. This is rather common among older fans. To tell the truth, even I have similar feelings: not only to recent titles, but also a bit to this very site.
While I'm typing this paragraph, I just finished FOUR HOURS of merging, splitting, cleaning, and verifying entries of the Encyclopedia, plus warning some borderline spammers, WITHOUT WATCHING A SINGLE EPISODE TODAY. Sometimes I ponder, "why should I clean up the mess created by someone who would only visit this site once or twice in his lifetime? Yet, why are there so many morons and why did they create so much mess? Why are there way more requests for downloads and 'what's your favorite XXX' than in-depth discussions?" Well, I persevere with a (somewhat *ahem* anal) belief that being meticulous here can benefit more anime fans throughout the world. Moreover, now I have access to many manga titles not available or listed in the Encyclopedia, so in addition to clean up others' mess I can contribute this site with my own pace and own way. Oh, just curious:
What are those "visual key groups" you are talking about? I don't expect there are many Sons of Key in Costa Rica (I'd be walking in the clouds if there are, by the way). |
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jay saenz
Posts: 81 Location: Costa Rica |
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Its visual kei (not key)... sorry for misstyping.
Yeah... visual has a lot of fans here, specially female fans... for me its not that appealing. And you are right... i don´t know any "sons of the key" around here 
BTW: I really apreciate your work with the encyclopedia and the site... I´ve learned a lot of interesting things here. |
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dormcat
Encyclopedia Editor
Posts: 9902 Location: New Taipei City, Taiwan, ROC |
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(Sigh) that's a bit disappointing.
Thank you. Your support is the driving force for us to keep improving this site. |
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LeoKnight25
 Posts: 319 Location: Puyallup, WA |
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I really sympathize with a lot of what you guys are saying. I've been into anime for as long as I can remember and I too find myself becoming a bit jaded. Especially at the current fandom. The internet has really allowed things to become kinda impersonal, therefore people don't feel the need to be civil with one another anymore because you're not face to face. That kinda also goes double for a lot of anime fans on the net. There doesn't seem to be any sort of mutual respect anymore, it's just a bunch of arguing, flaming and elitist posturing most of the time, and frankly I'm kinda sick of it. I hate it when people get mouthy and rude for no reason...it just makes my blood boil and honestly, if I'd meet some of these people in real life....well let's just say there might be a problem. My main point is that I love anime and I love being involved with things. I love showing people what I'm into. Sure, not everyone is going to be into the same things but, at least I expect people to give it a try and not snub their nose at it or be rude to me. It's just a common courtesy and I'm not sure that most people can understand that in this day and age, even outside of anime fandom. If anything, our involvement with the material should give us something in common and shouldn't seperate people based on things like whether or not you buy DVD's or whether you only download fansubs or even if you're into totally different material than someone else. Even if you only watch dubbed anime or subbed anime, edited or uncut or what not. It's not really in people's best interest to question others on what they do with their money or how they participate in said fandom. As long as they're not making profit illegally on the material then don't worry about it. Even then, things generally tend to sort themselves out in the end. Acting like an elitist snob and shunning people because they don't measure up to your version of what an anime fan is supposed to be only serves to further seperate people in an already messed up world. This is starting to sound like an After School Special here and for that I apologize
 but, it's just like learning to deal with issues of race, religion, color of someone's skin, or their sexual orientation and any other thing that seems to seperate folks nowadays. The faster you learn to deal with differences, the easier things will be for everyone. "The More You Know..." 
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Cloe
Moderator
 Posts: 2728 Location: Los Angeles, CA |
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I feel kind of the opposite. I tend not to get terribly upset when it comes to interacting with fans online, and it's quite easy to keep your temper when you're just looking at text on a screen. And I think it's fantastic that I can discuss something I'm genuinely interested with people from all over the world. But I find that I have to be physically away from anime fandom. Specifically, anime fans in large numbers. Because when you bring together large numbers of anime fans, the bragging starts up. "So when did you get into anime? Oh, 1992? Well, I've watched it since 1989." or "That sounds like a nice collection, but I have the ultra-limited edition series that only 20 copies were made of." And so on and so forth. Why do fans feels the need to put other people down to make themselves feel more important? I could care less who's been watching anime for the longest time, or who has the biggest limited edition collection of whatever; I just wish I could carry on a conversation with people without feeling like it's a competition. Here I've been able to contentedly discuss with jfrog and kagemusha, among others, anime and manga that we regard with a mutual respect; I rarely find such satisfying conversation with anime fans in my area. |
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Key
Moderator
 Posts: 18404 Location: Indianapolis, IN (formerly Mimiho Valley) |
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That's exactly why this is the only anime forum I frequent on a regular basis. Thanks in part to the tight moderation, you generally only get sensible conversations here and rarely see flame wars even on highly controversial topics. Even though many of its participants are still high school-aged, it's a more mature forum about anime than you'll probably see anywhere else on the Web.
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LeoKnight25
Posts: 319 Location: Puyallup, WA |
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I understand what you're saying about being there and experiencing some of that too. It's happened to me plenty of times..heh. It's almost as if you can't win sometimes. I'm with you, I just want to have a good time discussing anime with people and for the most part I've had that. There's been just a few major times where I've had problems with people both physically and on the internet. I just feel that the internet is very impersonal and sometimes I find it easier to determine what a person is talking about in person rather than in just text. Y'know, just kinda feel where they're coming from. Text can be easier for misinterpretation a lot of the time and maybe sometimes it's easier to read too much into something someone is saying but, to me it just feels a lot more impersonal and a lot of people seem to really take advantage of that and just act a fool. But, again I do know where you're coming from with being there physically with some rude and/or annoying people. Sakura Con's been that way with some really cool people but, also some very annoying and elitist asses that you really just wanna pop in the mouth. Maybe I just need to simmer down a bit...who knows. Anyway, it's been really great talking with everyone on here and I'm not sure if anyone has ever really said something like that, so I did. Here's to more stimulating conversation! |
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remember love
 Posts: 764 Location: Germany |
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I'm probably one of those newer generation that considers myself an otaku. But I see where your coming from and personally I feel the same way. When I started watching anime I was about 8 Years old and I didn't watch regular anime I started into Vampire Hunter D, Akira, Urusei Yatsura. When I got to the age of 16 (I'm 18 now) I started releasing youger kids that were my age when I started into anime getting into it and started hating some anime because the way they treated it (DBZ specially). I always saw anime not always as great entertainment but as art I guess you can say. And I kind of gotten bored with these different conventions going on but I didn't let it stop me from interacting with fans, I just ignored the tiny kids that think they know everything when the only thing in there mind is the stuff they play on cartoon network. And I dont do costume stuff either, I believe I don't need to dress up to show that I'm a fan, not saying anythings wrong with it other people can do it if they want to but I feel I don't need to. And I'm not interested in all the this new stuff with the costumes and the different projects that are happening around me.And like you I miss where you go to friends house with buddies and hang out and talk about anime you saw (and not just stuff on cartoon network, though that topic rose up eventually at times) and not have to go to a convention and dress up like a character just to prove you're a true fan. So, I think I understand where you're coming from. Sorry for the long post sometimes I get carried away. |
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Kazuki-san
 Posts: 2251 Location: Houston, TX |
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I agree with you mostly, but it's not just reading text on a screen either. I consider most of the regulars I have interacted with since I started posting here a friend. Granted, it's something of a one-dimesional thing, but I would say, for the most part, more then just an "aquaintance." You, for instance, I know very little about outside of the anime world. I know how you sing the lyrics to your SN's namesake, I know that you lived here, and I know that you like classical music, but that's about all save for anime. Still, if you were to post that I was a "jerk" or some other negative thing, I would take it to heart. Certainly moreso then some stranger I meet on the street.
I've run into people like that at cons, but I've also run into some really awesome people who are just there to share enjoyment of the thing they like with others. Unfortunately, those types of people exist in all walks of life, and they always come out of the woodwork when gathered in large numbers. I just tend to ignore them myself.
That's also how I feel. I've not always agreed with everyone, but I still try to respect their opinion (doesn't always work though). Take Ohoni, for instance. We disagree on several things, and it's quite clear neither of us will change our views, but I do still respect Ohoni's opinion, and we can disagree to our heart's content, but still have common ground to stand on. |
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Coffeeman
Posts: 298 |
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Just when you think you're out, it drags you right back in!
But I think the way to get out of the fandom is basically to cut yourself off forcefully; don't read, don't watch, nothing. When I cut myself off from wrestling, I stopped listening, watching, reading, hanging with friends, all tkinds of things, to distance myself from wrestling. And even then, you can't take all the stuff out of your mind, you just forget little bits of it... But it's all still there. When you see a movie poster for a Miyazaki or something, you'll still be a fan inside. So I think your best bet is just to tone it down, since you'll never really be "out." |
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Keonyn
 Subscriber Posts: 5567 Location: Coon Rapids, MN |
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Just stop watching or change your viewpoint when you watch and stop looking at them as more than what you are and labelling yourself "otaku". They're shows, sit down and watch them and enjoy them for what they are and when you're done shut them off and move on with life. There's no reason it should possess your life simply because you like them and there's no need to prove to anyone how great a fan you are by attending events or shows and whatnot.
Anime is entertainment, not a lifestyle. Listening to rap doesn't mean you have to a gangster and country doesn't force you to herd cattle. Being a trekkie doesn't make anyone dress up like Spock and so on. There's degree's of fandom, you don't have to do all those things just to be a fan, all you have to do is enjoy the genre. |
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Nani?
 Posts: 632 |
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My suggestion, find other interests, stay involved in things you genuinely enjoy, such as these forums, but skip the local anime convention to go hiking (like I did). Find other things to be involved with. Kindly smother the Otaku aspects of your life that you do not enjoy with other interests.
In so doing, remember an interest spawned from Anime does not have to stay Anime related. I have an invitation from a Japanese friend to stay at her home when I visit. Her "home" happens to be a 1000+ year old Shinto Shrine (probably older) where she is the hereditary Priestess (not Miko). I love to talk religion and "worldview" with her. I have never talked Anime with her and I doubt I would. I also never would have met her but for my interest in Anime. All the Best, Nani? |
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Haru to Ashura
 Posts: 617 Location: Termina |
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Well by-golly mister, we don't like you either.  Just teasing. Just remember that visual kei is a look, not a genre, and you shouldn't stereotype as "Japanese bands are all the same, that visual gothy crap, blah blah etc."
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