Senpai is an Otokonoko

Episode 5

If there's a boogieman for romcom fans, it's the dreaded “Misunderstanding” plot device. Anyone who's watched romcoms – be the anime or Western live-action – knows how much writers love to protract their romances by having characters mishear or misinterpret something they halfway overheard and then jump to conclusions about it. While I share that frustration, there's some nuance to the topic. After all, misunderstandings do happen in real life, and there are many organic, character-driven reasons for someone to unintentionally leap to those farfetched conclusions.

Take Makoto's misguided theory that Ryuji and Saki are secretly crushing on one another. Part of it is just a baseless assumption from Makoto wildly misreading signals, but most of it is driven by his insecurities. Makoto cannot see himself as a desirably romantic partner for somebody else, so he can only process Saki's confession as a mistake that she has seemingly corrected by apparently falling for a traditionally masculine boy. This only feeds into his fear of taking up space or causing problems for others, since he immediately views himself as a third wheel. None of his conclusions are accurate, but they speak to just how used to being isolated and ignored Makoto has become, even as more and more of his classmates have started connecting with him. This could have just been some wacky shenanigans based on Makoto getting a goofy idea in his head, but instead, it becomes a window into his own issues, and how they bounce off his equally troubled friends.

Ryuji's head is mostly straight, even if nothing else about him is. It was surprising to see him come clean to Saki at the start of this episode, but I suppose that shows how much he's come to trust her. I like how he refuses to let her run off once her facade starts to crack. Whatever Ryuji feels about Saki's relationship with Makoto, he understands how important she is to his closest friend, and isn't about to let her scamper off. It seems like he learned a lesson from what happened with Makoto leading up to the dance, and it's refreshing to see somebody in this love triangle holding down the fort.

Saki certainly isn't, no matter how much she tries to convince everyone – including herself. Her internal struggle isn't exactly a mirror of Makoto's. Saki's situation has less to do with her identity, and more how she relates (or doesn't) to the people around her, and how she's learned to compromise to avoid causing issues. While I don't know what word you'd use for it, she perceives a distance between herself and others that prevents her from really engaging with her peers. She becomes a people-pleaser, greeting everyone with a smile and ready to agree to whatever they say, regardless of her preference. So while she's outwardly more social, and has more friends, she wound up feeling just as isolated as Makoto.

That brings us to the question of what, precisely, Saki's feelings for Makoto are. Or rather, it brings up the question of why one needs a specific word for it to begin with. Saki cares about Makoto, and my take is that she resonated with his isolation, seeing in him a kindred spirit who also struggled to make connections but bravely held fast to himself rather than compromising to fit in. That's an aspect of Makoto she treasures, and whether you want to call it love, friendship, or something else altogether, it's undeniably a potent emotion. Yet Saki has convinced herself that because she experiences and expresses that feeling differently from others, it must be lesser than Ryuji's or anyone else's feelings for Makoto.

All mixed, it's a maelstrom of emotions that none of these kids are fully equipped to unpack, but damn if it isn't compelling to watch them try. In the final shot of this episode, as Makoto is left alone in that classroom, the sound of raindrops growing louder and louder in our ears punctuates it all perfectly. It's gripping, complex, and sympathetic character drama at its best.

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Senpai is an Otokonoko is currently streaming on Crunchyroll.